We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
