We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
