Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
This is my gift to your gina
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize