I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm eating all of the evidence.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
