So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'm at about main and main street
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
