Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
