You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
