Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
