spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I need a beard to bite.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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