You're my little dorito
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize