You kept calling me your small dog last night.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize