Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
