I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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