dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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