I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
