Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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