Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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