okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
