Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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