ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
