what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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