I saw his package. It spoke to me.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
