Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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