yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
