When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
