How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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