We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
