How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize