I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize