some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
