it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
