Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
