Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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