You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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