i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
