So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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