Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
