Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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