Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i came on her dog
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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