My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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