So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
