This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize