note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
