census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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