Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
