I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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