I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize