She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
