they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
pop tarts are not kleenex
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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