no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm too high and old for this...
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize