i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize