I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
how do flat chested girls get laid?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I need to calm my uterus...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
